I Like You That Way
by Surreptitious Chi X
Summary: During the time Kakashi and Yamato teach Naruto how to control his nature release. After Kakashi says that he is finally starting to like Naruto, Naruto reads into that statement and becomes alarmed. Kakashi wishes Naruto would drop it. He thinks Naruto has. But then Naruto comes back and asks him a question. Now a two-shot. Second part after the battle with Hidan and Kakuzu.
1. I Like You That Way

**I Like You That Way**

* * *

Naruto walked over to where Kakashi was reading his Icha Icha under a tree.

"Kaka-sensei…"

Kakashi glanced at him.

Naruto was nervous and unsure of something. He stared at the ground, the way he used to when he had something really important to ask. "When you said you were finally starting to like me, and I freaked out, and you said you didn't mean it that way…" Naruto glanced up at him. "Did you mean it that way?"

"What way?" Kakashi asked nonchalantly. "When I said I didn't mean it that way, I was addressing the implication that I had not liked you up until that point. I was afraid that I had hurt your feelings, when such a thing was not necessary. Or intended. I am not the most demonstrative person, so my words got tangled up. Does that make sense?"

Naruto furrowed his brow and looked at the blades of grass waving in the wind. "Yeah…but that's not what I'm talking about."

Kakashi stood up rested his hand on Naruto's shoulder, tucking his book into his pocket. "What are you talking about?" Naruto was not the kind of person to concern himself with small problems. For Naruto to be upset, what was on his mind had to be earth-shattering. Therefore, Kakashi was concerned.

"If you like guys," Naruto said. "Or not."

"If I…" Kakashi chuckled, squeezing Naruto's shoulder. "I see."

Naruto raised his head and took in Kakashi's expression. Then he started laughing. "It's a pretty silly question, isn't it?"

"Yes, it is," Kakashi agreed.

"You can't be gay! You keep reading those Icha Icha stories Jiraiya writes," Naruto said. He kept laughing. "Of course you're not gay. A gay person wouldn't read Icha Icha."

"No, but a bisexual person might," Kakashi said. His voice didn't change, but his expression became deadly serious.

Naruto stopped laughing instantly. He looked at Kakashi with wary, wide-eyed confusion. "Huh? What's that?"

"A bisexual person is a person who likes both sexes equally," Kakashi said. "A person who could fall in love with a man, or a woman." He smiled, though it was a surely inappropriate smile for the context. "Or sometimes both at once."

"Uh…" Naruto's mouth fell open. He looked at Kakashi for a moment with blank horror, then let out a yell and stumbled back, out of range of Kakashi's hand. He pointed at Kakashi, shaking. "That's perverted!"

"Hmm," Kakashi said, which was neither an agreement nor a disagreement. "You think so?" He smiled. "You seem to think a lot of things are perverted."

"A lot of things are perverted," Naruto retorted.

"Is being in love perverted?" Kakashi asked.

That stopped Naruto cold. He had to think about it. "I don't know."

"If being in love motivates you to kiss someone, is that perverted?" Kakashi asked.

"How would I know?" Naruto demanded. "The only person I've ever kissed is Sasuke, and I didn't even want to! It was an accident!" He threw up his hands. "Honestly! Kissing that jerk twice and not getting to kiss Sakura-chan once. It's an outrage. It sucks!"

"And your desire to kiss Sakura-chan is not perverted?" Kakashi asked innocently.

Naruto flushed. "I…don't know…" He looked worried. "Maybe." Then he got angry all over again and pointed at Kakashi. "But you're just changing the subject! Are you one of those super creepy bisexual people you talked about?"

Kakashi stared at Naruto for a moment, taken aback. Then he hung his head. "Creepy?"

Naruto blinked. "Huh? What's the matter, Kaka-sensei?"

Kakashi slowly raised his head and pointed at himself. "I'm creepy?"

Naruto frowned, stroking his chin. "You're creepy in a lot of ways."

"Huh?" Kakashi's shoulders sagged in disbelief.

"You have silver hair, you never say much, you've only got one eye that's really yours, the other one is an Uchiha thing you never explained how you got, you're always reading porn and you don't seem to care much about anything." Naruto nodded. "Yeah, I'd say that's pretty creepy. I mean, you don't tell anybody what you're really thinking, and half the time when we think we're talking to you it's just a clone because you ran off and did something else."

Kakashi felt supremely cut down. "I always use a shadow clone when I have to leave on emergencies. I told you, a shadow clone shares their experiences –"

Naruto stroked his chin and frowned harder. "On the other hand, a lot of the things that make you creepy also make you cool."

Kakashi was confused all over again. He scratched his temple. "They do?"

"Your silver hair is really stylish, even if it's weird, and you have a super special top secret jutsu you keep in your eye, and being silent and not caring about other people seems to be the universal definition of what's cool," Naruto said. "Plus you're really loyal and you love us and would die to protect us, so it's like you're part of the family. And we couldn't live without you and you're the best teacher ever, so…"

Kakashi could tell Naruto had confused himself. "So…?"

Naruto sighed and stopped the intense thinking. "Maybe it's okay that you're gay. Or bisexual, or whatever you are. It's okay, because you're still you, and you're the same as when I knew nothing. You're Kaka-sensei, and that's that."

Kakashi felt unusually touched. Naruto had taken him off guard, as usual. "Thank you. That means a lot to me, Naruto."

Naruto smiled. "Yeah…well…" He studied the rustling leaves of the trees. "What if…Did you mean it that you liked me like that? That gay way?"

Kakashi knew he could solve all this with a lie, but that might not be the best solution. So he stuck it out. "What would you do if that were true?"

"I don't know!" Naruto protested. He looked at Kakashi with wide eyes. "How am I supposed to know what to do when that happens? I don't like guys!"

"What if you just said no?" Kakashi asked lightly. "No, I'm not interested, so please don't look at me that way?"

"Well – But – Then…" Naruto struggled, his brow furrowing. "Then we wouldn't be friends anymore. Or teacher and student, or whatever. Because it'd be uncomfortable. You can't stop liking me that way, and I can't stop not being interested. Then…Doesn't that put a damper on things? Wouldn't that damage the team? What about teamwork? What about being there for each other?"

"What about you and Sakura-chan?" Kakashi asked. "Does liking her and Sakura-chan not liking you in return cause a rift in your teamwork?"

Naruto looked stricken by the suggestion, but he thought about it, staring at the ground. "No…I guess when it really matters we're always there for each other. Our non-relationship is just something we joke about nowadays."

"Then it can be that way with us," Kakashi said gently. "If I did like you that way. You wouldn't have to be alarmed, Naruto. We'd just be comfortable with that. Because we'd know that neither one of us is going to cross our boundaries."

Naruto nodded, his brow furrowed in thought. "I guess so. Yeah. That makes sense." Then he looked at Kakashi in confusion. "So do you really like me that way, Kaka-sensei?"

"I…I don't," Kakashi said finally. "But if I were…to like somebody that way…I would not want you to reject me as your sensei."

"I wouldn't do that," Naruto objected. "Never!" He ran to Kakashi's side, hesitated, and then slowly wrapped his arms around Kakashi's waist. "I love you. No matter what – no matter what happens, I'll always love you. You'll always be my sensei. I can't give you up like that; you're one of my precious people."

Kakashi closed his eyes and desperately grabbed onto those words. "Thank you…Naruto." When Naruto didn't let go, he hesitantly raised a hand and ruffled Naruto's hair.

Naruto smiled up at him.

Kakashi wanted to kiss him.


	2. You Said You Loved Me

**Author's Note: **Skipping ahead to after Kakashi fills in the missing team leader position for Shikamaru, Ino, and Chouji so they can fight Hidan and Kakuzu, after Kakashi ends up feeding Naruto ramen because of Naruto's injured arm. **  
**

* * *

**You Said You Loved Me**

* * *

They ran into each other the day after regrouping at Ichiraku's, Kakashi on his way to Tsunade to ask for an update on the Akatsuki situation, and Naruto…looking aimless and Naruto-ish.

Kakashi pointed. "What happened to your cast?"

Naruto straightened proudly. "Sakura-chan took it off."

"Why?"

"I'm healed!" Naruto grinned and flashed Kakashi a thumbs up. "That's the awesome power of the Kyuubi!"

"That is impressive," Kakashi said. "Your healing abilities have improved even since you were a child, haven't they?"

Naruto laughed. "They sure have."

Kakashi chuckled and ruffled Naruto's hair. "Do you remember a long time ago, when I nominated you for the Chunin Exam and you said you loved me?"

Naruto smoothed his hair down automatically and looked at Kakashi with wide eyes as he registered what was said. Then he grinned. "Kaka-sensei, that wasn't such a long time ago. You're exaggerating."

"It feels like a long time ago, doesn't it?" Kakashi said, tilting his head and smiling. "It feels like a very long time between twelve and sixteen…"

His smile faded somewhat as he recalled what a huge leap that age range had been for him, even as someone who had graduated the Academy at the same age civilian children entered first grade. Between twelve and sixteen. That had been going from newly missing his eye and having to get used to Obito's sacrifice, all the way to coping somehow without the team he grew up with and being two years into ANBU service. That had been a harsh and lonely road, from twelve to sixteen.

Naruto blinked. "Huh? Is something the matter?"

Kakashi realized he'd drifted into self-inspection. "Sorry."

"Something is the matter, isn't it?" Naruto felt his forehead. "You're still not feeling well from your close scrape on that last mission."

"No, I'm fine," Kakashi protested. "I was just thinking."

"Thinking?" Naruto scowled as though he'd never heard of the word. "Thinking about what?"

Kakashi imagined telling Naruto exactly what he'd been thinking about. _That would be awkward._ He looked away. "Never mind."

"As I thought," Naruto said triumphantly. "You're sick and need to be back in bed."

"Bed?" Kakashi cringed. "I hate beds. They're my mortal enemy."

Naruto chuckled. "Strange words for a man who likes to be lazy all the time."

"Maa, how cruel," Kakashi complained. "First you tell me to get back in bed, and then you call me lazy."

Naruto folded his arms over his chest. "You're going back to bed if I have to march you there myself."

Kakashi hung his head. "At your power level, you could actually deliver if I disobey, couldn't you? The days of evading you are over."

Naruto nodded decisively. "Mm-hmm. Damn right they are. We're going over to your apartment right now, and I am going to tuck you in."

"Oh, no," Kakashi said, managing some mild hint of dismay in his voice.

In fact, the idea of Naruto tucking him into bed sounded nice. Even if he didn't really want to be sent back to bed so soon after climbing out. He was an opportunist, and this might be the only chance he got for such a thing to happen. He could die, Naruto could die, they both could die… Or they could both live and this would simply never happen again. He had no idea which scenario was more depressing.

"That's right." Naruto pointed. "Start walking."

Kakashi obediently stuffed his hands in his pockets and walked down the street, Naruto herding him.

"Maa, does this mean I get a bedtime story?" Kakashi asked.

"Don't make light!" Naruto yelled. "You're sick and you need to take better care of yourself!" He huffed, sticking out his lower lip. "Honestly. You scared me half to death looking the way you did when I came onto the battlefield."

Kakashi felt a little warmer at that. "I did?" He chuckled. "Sorry."

"How come you were out there with those guys in the first place?" Naruto asked.

"Asuma's dead," Kakashi said simply.

"So? I know that!"

"They needed a sensei." Kakashi thought it was obvious. He was a sensei, Asuma's former team was missing a sensei. It made sense for him to fill in until they didn't need a sensei anymore. A traumatic death made it all the more necessary for someone to step into Asuma's role. Asuma would have given his life for them. So he needed to be able to do the same thing. Protect them.

Naruto grabbed his shoulder and yanked him around, so that they were facing each other. "Like I don't?"

Kakashi stared at Naruto, noting the angry expression. He didn't know what to say. "No?"

Naruto smacked him. "You're so clueless! Honestly!" He ground his teeth. "Between you and Iruka-sensei, you're the only teachers I have! The only adults I have. Baa-chan hardly counts, she's no Jiji, and Jiraiya is dead, so you're all I've got. Don't go thinking you can give yourself away to some other team, even if you think I've surpassed you. Teachers have a purpose beyond being teachers."

Kakashi rubbed his cheek. "Ow." He meant more than the physical pain when he said that.

Naruto growled and made a fist. "I'll smack you again if I think you're going to sneak off and moonlight as someone else's sensei. Got it?"

"You're taking Tsunade lessons," Kakashi moaned. "I know it. You've gotten much more violent."

"Well, maybe Baa-chan has the right idea." Naruto crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow. "Smack your precious people so they don't get out of line."

Kakashi wilted. "I'm pretty sure that's called abuse." He glanced around. "Are there any shelters for battered sensei?"

Naruto let out his breath with an exasperated sigh and hauled Kakashi into his arms, taking to the rooftops.

Kakashi instinctively clung to him to keep from falling. Then he realized he was being carried bridal style by his own student, high above the street here anyone could see them. "Oi. Isn't this a little undignified?"

"I don't want you using up any more chakra, and I don't know advanced teleportation techniques like you do," Naruto said. "I'm doing the only thing I know how: taking care of you the old fashioned way."

Kakashi fell silent, embarrassed. Letting someone carry him was embarrassing when he could walk, but more than that, he was embarrassed that a part of him liked being close to Naruto this way. And that part of him definitely liked the sound of Naruto declaring to take care of him 'the old fashioned way'. That brought to mind being tucked into bed, cups of hot sake or miso soup on cold days, and snuggling.

He was sure all that was not what Naruto had in mind, and he was more likely to be smacked around and scolded some more, not treated to miso soup. All the same, it was a nice thought.

**xXx**

They reached his apartment in record time. Kakashi opened the door and let Naruto in, self-conscious of the fact that Naruto had never been in his apartment before.

Naruto seemed impressed at the cleanliness.

For a moment, they stood in Kakashi's kitchen and dining room area. It was a combined area of crisp white tile, the kitchen on one end and a small table with two chairs at the other end, by the door. There wasn't much to his apartment. There didn't need to be. He was the only one who had ever lived in it.

"I'll let you see underneath my mask," Kakashi said. He wasn't even sure why he offered.

Naruto gave him a look. "Don't you get tired of playing that game with people?"

"What game?"

Naruto made a face. "'I'll let you see what's underneath my mask'…and then you show us another mask!"

"I won't do that this time, I promise," Kakashi said hastily. "That was just a prank. I knew you three were trying to get underneath my mask all the time, and I just wanted to teach you a lesson. I'm ready to show you now. I promise."

"You promise, ne?" Naruto considered him for a moment.

Kakashi nodded, smiling sheepishly.

"Alright. I'll go for it." Naruto stabbed a finger at him. "But so help me, Kaka-sensei, if this turns out to be another trick, I'll – I'll Rasengan-Shuriken you! Two letdowns in a row is just too much to bear! I can't promise to be a sane man after something like that." He clenched his fists.

Kakashi cringed and pulled down his mask, exposing his face. It felt oddly like skinning himself in front of Naruto. He closed his eyes. "Well?"

Naruto made a small, inarticulate sound.

Kakashi opened his good eye. Naruto was standing there, shaking, looking at him with wide eyes. "Naruto?"

Naruto let out a strangled scream. "You're handsome! Handsomer than Sasuke!" He fell over dramatically, twitching. "Why am I the ugly one on the team? I'm so cute! Everyone else says so…Why?"

Kakashi wished that he could laugh at a time like this. No sound was emerging. All he could really do was stare in shock at Naruto's reaction and wonder if he really was handsome. "Ne, Naruto?"

"Hai…?"

"It's okay," Kakashi said. "I think you're cute."

Naruto was off of his floor and plastered against his front door in an instant, sweating bullets. "Why? Why do you say those things?"

Kakashi smacked his forehead. "Wait. I forgot."

Naruto pointed at him shakily. "And with your mask off…looking so handsome…Noooo!" He flung the door open and ran.

Kakashi felt pathetically let down. "Aren't you going to tuck me in?"

Naruto yelled back at him from down the stairs. "No! Not unless you cover your face! Cover the face!"

Kakashi pulled his mask back up, wide-eyed. He didn't know what to make of the pure anguish in Naruto's voice. "I put my mask back on," he called uncertainly.

Silence.

"Naruto? Are you there?"

He walked to the door and peered out.

Naruto crept back up the stairs into view and cast a suspicious glance. Then he collapsed on the landing with a sigh of relief. "Oh, good." He lay there for a moment, shaking.

Kakashi scratched his temple. What was that all about?

Naruto picked himself up and dusted himself off. He gave Kakashi the same scolding look as he had in the beginning and made shooing motions. "Go. Off to bed. I'll tuck you in and then I'll say good night."

Kakashi retreated back inside his apartment and walked to bed, Naruto following close behind him every time he looked over his shoulder.

When they got to his bedroom, Naruto shot in front of him and pulled down the covers, then gestured solemnly.

Kakashi climbed into bed.

Naruto pulled the covers up gently, his expression turning sad. "Don't get out of bed, okay? Not until you're ready."

"What about using the bathroom?" Kakashi asked, worried that Naruto was actually serious about that command.

Naruto immediately looked exasperated. "You know what I mean. Don't do anything stupid. Kaka-sensei, you're good at that. I don't like it." He pouted. "I want to have my sensei around when I'm an old man, not be alone and pathetic."

"I'm sorry." It struck home to Kakashi for the first time that he had scared Naruto within an inch of his student's life. "I'm truly sorry."

Naruto suddenly dropped to his knees and wrapped his arms around Kakashi's shoulders, burying his face against Kakashi's chest. "Don't leave. I'd be all alone."

Kakashi petted Naruto's hair. He thought that was a little bit of an exaggeration, but he didn't want to say anything when Naruto was feeling this way. It wouldn't help. "Maa, I'm aware of that. So I'm not leaving."

He wished Minato had stayed. But he couldn't have everything he wanted. Some days, it felt like he couldn't have anything.


	3. Kakashi's Face

**Kakashi's Face**

* * *

By the time that Sakura and Sai arrived at the Ichiraku Ramen stand, Naruto was already there. But he wasn't bouncing up and down on his stool and calling for more ramen. Instead, he was sitting sideways, pensively looking at his feet. Sakura hadn't seen Naruto like this in years.

"Good afternoon," Sai said, and sat down on Naruto's left.

Naruto doubled over and heaved a sigh. "I need a drink."

"What? What's wrong?" Sakura asked, looking concerned. She took the stool on the opposite side of Naruto.

Naruto shuddered. "You'll never believe it, Sakura-chan." He rubbed his cheeks with both hands and shuddered again, shaking his head. "Not in a million years."

Sakura watched him with wide eyes.

Naruto grabbed the cup of sake Teuchi set in front of him, downed it in one gulp, and thunked his head on the counter. "Thanks, Teuchi-san."

"No problem," Teuchi said, looking as concerned as Sakura. "Anything for my favorite customer."

"What is it, Naruto?" Sakura touched his arm. "What could be so horrible that it makes you want to drink? You never drank before…"

Naruto uttered a half-hysterical laugh. "It is horrible. It's horrible…"

"Perhaps you are exaggerating," Sai suggested brightly, though his face remained stoic. "You should tell us what is troubling you, and we, your friends, should endeavor to fix it for you so you are no longer so disturbed."

Naruto shook his head, rubbing the side of his face against the countertop. "You can't fix this, Sai. No one can."

"Oh, out with it already!" Sakura gestured impatiently, her eyes flashing.

Naruto raised his head and looked at her. He was pale, and his eyes were wide. "I've seen Kaka-sensei's face."

Sakura turned white and fell off her stool. "No way," she said weakly, reaching for purchase with one hand.

"Is he terribly disfigured?" Sai asked, in that same bright voice.

"No," Naruto said shakily. "Worse."

"Worse?" Sakura timidly climbed back onto her stool.

Naruto shuddered, turning away and facing the counter again. "Another shot of sake, please. I don't think I can handle it."

"Handle what?" Sakura demanded.

"Maybe he has no face," Sai said.

Naruto downed his second shot of sake. "I wish that were true." He looked disheartened, so disheartened that Sakura wanted to touch his shoulder, offer some kind of comfort. "It's worse," Naruto whispered. "It's worse even than that." He raised his eyes to meet Sakura's. There was a startling amount of pain in his crystal blue eyes. "He's handsome."

Naruto wiped his mouth, as if he could wipe away those words. "He's the handsomest man I've ever seen."

Sakura felt a red wave of anger and exasperation crash down behind her eyes. "Baka!" She punched him. "How is that a problem?"

Naruto went flying, but only ten feet. He skidded on his face and lay still for a moment, then sat up and rubbed his cheek. "Ow, Sakura-chan. How are you so abusive towards me when I need your help?"

"Need my help?" Sakura crossed her arms. "I thought you said no one could help."

"Yeah, but I just thought of something." Naruto picked himself up. "You could help me by erasing my memories."

"I could what?" Sakura retorted in disbelief.

"You know medical jutsu," Naruto said. "And you're good with genjutsu. You know all kinds of stuff. I bet you could figure out a way to take my memories."

Sakura snorted and looked away. "Why would I do that?"

"So that I don't have to remember Kaka-sensei's face," Naruto protested, walking over and sitting down on his stool again. He glanced at Teuchi. "Miso pork ramen, please."

"Hai, hai," Teuchi said.

Naruto dug into his ramen disconsolately. "I can't get it out of my mind. That face…"

"Don't be a baby," Sakura said. "You're lucky. Think of how many times we've all tried to get underneath Kaka-sensei's mask and see his face."

"That seems like an odd sort of sport," Sai said. "What is the reason for this?"

Sakura gave Sai a look. "We just wanted to know. We were children. Haven't you ever been curious about something stupid?"

"No," Sai said.

Sakura was exasperated. "I believe it." She turned her attention back to Naruto. "Not only could I not erase your memories, it'd be illegal. Tsunade-sama would cut off my hands for performing a jutsu like that. It's Orochimaru stuff, what you're asking of me."

Naruto poked his ramen with his chopsticks. "No, then, huh." He sighed. "Okay…I'll just have to think of something else do to that makes me forget."

"Why do you want to forget in the first place?" Sakura asked.

Naruto cupped his chin in his hand and frowned at her. "Didn't you hear me? He's handsome. Handsomer than Iruka-sensei, handsomer than Sasuke, handsomer than…than…anybody!" He threw up his hands.

"So, what's the problem?" Sakura wore a small half-smile. "I'd be happy to see a face like that. I'd be thrilled. Especially if it belonged to someone I like. Kaka-sensei's not a bad guy. So why do you wish you hadn't seen his face?"

"There was like, light coming out of it or something," Naruto said, seeming oblivious to her words. "It was so pale and perfect. And he had these lips…" He shuddered. "Don't get me started, Sakura-chan. I want these memories to fade already." He summoned up enough strength to devour the rest of his ramen, though.

"Light coming out of his face?" Sakura giggled.

"I know," Sai said suddenly. "Kakashi-sensei's face is a light bulb!"

"No!" Naruto snapped. "God, what is it with you?"

"I don't know," Sai said seriously. "I don't seem to be comprehending your use of language."

"No kidding," Naruto muttered. "I mean, think for a moment. How could a light bulb be beautiful? I kept saying Kaka-sensei's face is handsome."

"But you keep saying you are disturbed by this handsomeness," Sai pointed out, raising an index finger. "Therefore I discern that you do not mean handsome, for people are not disturbed by handsome features. You must mean ugly, and are confused, and to some, light bulbs could be considered ugly. So you could be speaking about ugly faces and light bulbs."

"No, I couldn't." Naruto groaned. "Just forget about it."

"Okay," Sai agreed.

Sakura's lips twitched. She was trying not to laugh. Then a thought occurred to her. "Ne, Naruto, does that mean Iruka-sensei's face disturbs you?"

Naruto looked at her uneasily. "A little bit…but he's nice! I don't mind it all that much. I've learned to live with Iruka-sensei's face." He cringed. "And please don't tell him that. I don't want to hurt his feelings."

"But you mean that his handsomeness disturbs you," Sakura said, making sure she had this right. One always had to double-check their conversations with Naruto.

"Yes." Naruto nodded.

Sakura gestured. "So that means Sasuke-kun's face disturbs you even more."

"God, yes," Naruto wailed. "It's so disturbing. And I can't stand it the way everyone wants to fall all over him because of it. Can't they see how wrong it is?"

Sakura nodded to herself slowly. Things were starting to make sense to her. Sort of. "So…Kaka-sensei's face disturbs you so much that you don't want to remember looking at it, because he's handsomer than Iruka-sensei or Sasuke-kun."

"Yes!" Naruto clenched his fists, looking at her desperately. "You understand now, don't you? Don't you, Sakura-chan?"

"I think so," Sakura said.

"I do not understand," Sai announced. "It sounds as if Naruto-niisan is broken."

Sakura snorted.

"Oh, very funny," Naruto said grumpily. "Ha ha."

Yamato came up and sat down on the stool next to Sai. "What's the matter?" He took in Naruto's obvious distress, Sai's confusion, and Sakura's amusement. "Is something wrong?"

"Yamato-taichou, where have you been?" Sakura asked. "Don't tell me you're going to start behaving like Kaka-sensei."

"I'm sorry," Yamato said. "As a matter of fact, I just came from Kakashi-sempai's place. I had an unexpected errand to run that involved him, and when I came to check on him, I found him in bed. It seems he's still sick after all."

Naruto said gloomily, "I know. I talked to him yesterday."

"Oh." Yamato scratched his head. "Well, that explains it, I guess. He said he wouldn't get out of bed until you told him to, Naruto-kun." A strange expression crossed his face. "Actually, that doesn't explain it. Why would Sempai listen to you, Naruto-kun? No offense, but Sempai's never listened to anybody about staying in bed before."

Naruto stared at the ramen counter blankly. "I guess…because I begged him to."

Yamato and Sakura looked shocked.

"Why did you do that, Naruto?" Sakura asked.

Naruto's head snapped up. "You saw!" He looked around at them. "You all saw. Kaka-sensei almost died, and then he gets up and walks around like nothing happened? I don't think so! Not on my watch." He crossed his arms over his chest. "He needs to take better care of himself, and if no one else is going to make him do it, I will. Dattebayo." He nodded to himself.

Yamato looked at Naruto with a bemused smile. "I see…" He chuckled. Then something visibly occurred to him, and he laughed so much he almost fell off of his stool.

Sakura and Sai looked at him questioningly.

Yamato didn't stop laughing for two solid minutes. Then he stood, abruptly serious. "Well, Naruto-kun, are you ready to train? You need to refine your Rasengan-Shuriken."

"That's right!" Naruto's eyes widened at the mention of training. He hopped up from his stool. "See you later, Sakura-chan, Sai! I'm going to train with Yamato-taichou!"

The two of them set off for their favorite training field.

Sakura watched them go. "That was strange…" She glanced at Sai. "What do you think Yamato-taichou was laughing at?"

"I do not know," Sai said. "I do not know him very well. Perhaps he is suffering from a mental illness."

Sakura gave him a look. "You're suffering from a mental illness."

"I know. But I wish to become better."

Sakura felt bad, after a statement like that. "I know you are."

"You are lying to make me feel better," Sai said brightly. "This is very nice of you."

Sakura sighed, and then smiled at him. "Okay. Let's go train ourselves, huh, Sai?"

"Sure thing, Ugly-Face."

It was getting to the point where she didn't even hit him for that.


	4. Friendship: Believe It!

**Friendship: Believe It!**

* * *

Yamato and Naruto reached their habitual training ground. "Alright, Sempai says that you need to work on refining the shape and strength of the rasengan-shuriken to make it an effective attack. He wants you to make it smaller, so that you can perform the attack twice instead of once. He said, and I quote, 'Only idiots believe in the ultimate attack jutsu that can end any fight. This isn't a manga.'"

Naruto cringed, crestfallen. "Kaka-sensei, so cruel. Wasn't it badass enough, Yamato-taichou? You saw how cool it was."

"I also saw that you missed," Yamato said dryly.

"You're getting to be just like Kaka-sensei," Naruto accused, pointing at him.

Yamato raised an eyebrow. "Or maybe I was always this way, and Kakashi-sempai learned it from me."

Naruto shuddered. "Scary."

Yamato nodded. "Uh-huh. So you better do your work. Or else I might have to rule by fear and pull out the Scary Face again."

Naruto held up his hands. "Alright, alright!"

Yamato laughed. He dropped into a fighting stance. "So, let's go. Show me what you've got, Naruto."

After fifteen minutes of cursing and flailing and arguments with his shadow clones, Naruto had to stop to rethink his strategy. He plopped down on the grass. "I don't get it. Why can't I make it any smaller?"

"You just need practice," Yamato said soothingly, sitting down beside him. "It will come to you. It's always harder to compact a powerful jutsu into a smaller shape. It's more energy in less space. The energy resists you."

"I never thought of that," Naruto said.

Yamato jumped up. "Well, back to work."

"But I just sat down," Naruto protested.

"You're not out of chakra, are you?" Yamato teased.

Naruto was back on his feet in a flash. "No!" He looked at Yamato reproachfully. "I got lots of chakra left!"

"Then let's go," Yamato said. "We don't have time to fool around."

Half an hour later, Naruto had managed to reduce the size of his attack by twenty percent, but it was still too big. He moaned and groaned, but it was progress.

"Yamato-taichou, how small does this thing have to be?" Naruto complained.

"Think chidori-sized," Yamato said.

Naruto made a face. "Alright, alright." He made a shadow clone and started the process all over again.

_Speaking of Sempai…_ Yamato thought, supervising Naruto absently.

"So, tell me, since when have you gotten such a hold on Sempai?" Yamato asked.

"Huh? Hold?" Naruto's rasengan dissipated half-formed from lack of concentration. "What do you mean?"

Yamato chuckled gleefully. "He actually told me…" He cleared his throat and deepened his voice to try to match Kakashi's. "'Maa, I guess I'm not getting out of bed until Naruto comes by and tells me it's okay'." Yamato grinned. "He sounded miserable."

"Why should that make you happy?" Naruto asked.

Yamato said cheerfully, "He's picked on me all my life. Well, since I knew him, anyway, which has been practically forever. He's always overworked me and he's never given me a single moment of thanks, and I don't see why he shouldn't suffer a little bit when someone else finally gets the upper hand." He patted Naruto's shoulder. "Hang onto it for as long as you can, that's what I say, because when it's over –" He shook his head. "You are going to be one miserable student."

"What, so it's either I'm miserable or he's miserable?" Naruto protested.

"Pretty much." Yamato shrugged. "It's always been this way with other people and Kakashi. Either he's making everyone around him miserable, or someone else is managing to pay back the misery. You should see him and Gai." He made a face. "It's awful. They do their best to get on each other's nerves, I swear. And yet they're inseparable sometimes. I don't get it."

"Bushy-Brows Sensei?" Naruto asked. "I thought Kaka-sensei just ignored that guy."

Yamato grinned. "Not always. Sometimes Gai can really get on Kakashi's nerves." He chuckled. "It's wonderful."

Naruto gave him a horrified look. "How can you call yourself Kaka-sensei's friend with an attitude like that?"

"His friend?" Yamato blinked. "But I'm not. I'm his Kouhai. There's a huge difference. He's always going to be that guy who's a few years older than me and very cruel, and I'm always going to be that guy who's a few years younger than him doing all of his work and getting nothing in return."

He gestured. "As a matter of fact, the situation right now is classic. I should have guessed that somehow Sempai would figure out a way to unload his team onto me. It's just what Sempai does. If there's anything he doesn't want to do, I do it." He sighed. "At least in that way Gai is luckier than me. He's always managed to hold out against Kakashi-sempai's blackmail."

"Blackmail?" Naruto was confused.

Yamato sighed again and nodded. "Anyway, let's get back to your training. It's very important to Lady Tsunade that you advance in your abilities in time to meet the next attack of the enemy."

A few minutes later, after plowing another devastating furrow in the soil, Naruto asked, "So who are Kaka-sensei's friends?"

Yamato looked started. "Kakashi-sempai doesn't have any friends."

"Everyone has friends," Naruto protested. "Why should Kaka-sensei not have any friends?"

"Like I said, he pushes them away," Yamato said. "I would have been his friend years ago if it weren't for his constant abuse and steady stream of whining excuses every time I tried to get him to do something with me. He's just a solitary guy." Yamato heaved a sigh. "I don't think he wants any friends."

"That doesn't sound like the Kaka-sensei I know," Naruto said firmly, wearing a frown.

Yamato looked doubtful. "Maybe he's changed." Then he scolded, "This would be a lot easier if you would concentrate, Naruto-kun."

Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "Sorry."

"Do you really…like Kakashi-sempai?" Yamato asked.

Naruto looked scandalized. "Of course I do! He's my sensei."

"People don't always like their teachers," Yamato said. He looked away. "I didn't like mine, that's for sure. He was always a prick."

"Don't you like anyone, Yamato-taichou?" Naruto protested. "You're so negative all the time."

Yamato pouted, furrowing his brow. "Of course I like people. I love people. I just don't like terrible, abusive, lazy people. Like Kakashi-sempai."

Naruto smacked his forehead. "Like who?"

"Well…" Yamato had to think. "Like, well, like…Sakura." He beamed. "I like Sakura-chan. She works hard and she's always on time."

"Is that what it takes?" Naruto muttered.

"And she's usually positive, and in a good mood, and she'll do things for you if you ask her to," Yamato said. "So yeah. I like Sakura-chan a lot. Um…" He rubbed his chin. "Sai isn't bad. Really, I sympathize with him. I know how it feels to be someone's guinea pig and always get the short end of the stick. That's been my life in a nutshell. So I really do sympathize with Sai, and I hope he grows as a person by being on our team."

"But who from your old life do you have connections to?" Naruto asked. "You only got assigned to this team recently."

Yamato's expression turned withdrawn. "You don't make friends in ANBU." He turned away. "Maybe that is the problem with Kakashi-sempai," he murmured more to himself than Naruto. "Sempai was in ANBU way too long…"

"Kaka-sensei has always been nice to me, and I get along with him fine," Naruto declared. He planted his hands on his hips. "I don't mean to sound like I don't believe you when you say Kaka-sensei has problems being close to people. Maybe he does. You knew him before I did, and I know that he's not very demonstrative when he likes someone. So maybe you just can't tell when he's around someone he likes. But Kaka-sensei likes me, and he said so. So I'm not just going to take your word for it when you say Kaka-sensei doesn't have any friends."

Naruto jerked a thumb at himself. "Because I know one thing: I'm Kaka-sensei's friend."

Yamato turned around and looked at Naruto with dawning amazement.

Naruto stood his ground and nodded. "Dattebayo."

"I believe it," Yamato said, his eyes round with surprise.

"Good." Naruto grinned. "Now let's get back to making me even more badass than before so Baa-chan can be proud of me."

Yamato laughed. "Okay." He slid into a sparring stance. "You're on." As they fought, Yamato kept the small smile from his face. _You succeeded where I failed. Good for you, Naruto. _He hoped that Naruto would be the kind of friend Kakashi would be incapable of driving away.

Kakashi needed friends like that.


	5. Everyone Goes Through It

**Everyone Goes Through It**

* * *

Sakura tracked Naruto down at the training field after her own afternoon of sparring with Sai. Yamato was collapsed, breathing heavily. Sakura smiled and ignored the captain, instead making her way towards Naruto.

Naruto waved. He stood on the other side of the field. The field was pockmarked with craters. After Yamato regained some of his strength, he'd have to fix the field up as usual. "Ah, Sakura-chan! Hello!"

"Hello, Naruto," Sakura said. She skirted a particularly deep hole and came to stand by him.

He grinned at her. "How are you?"

"Fine," Sakura said.

"You're covered in ink," Naruto said.

Sakura smiled wryly. "That's what happens when you spar with Sai."

"Here." Naruto pulled the small towel off his shoulders and held it out to her.

Sakura snorted. "Honestly? Your sweat-soaked towel? Naruto, when will you ever learn." She wrinkled her nose. "Girls don't like that stuff. We care about bodily excretions."

Naruto lowered the towel, looking a little disappointed. "And here I thought you would kiss me and stuff, for being so thoughtful," he said pitifully.

Sakura rolled her eyes. Then she realized his comment could be the perfect opening for this discussion.

"Why do you want to kiss me, if you find Iruka-sensei's, Sasuke-kun's, and Kaka-sensei's faces so interesting?" Sakura asked sweetly.

"Because you're normal," Naruto said. "And they're not interesting, they're disturbing. I thought you understood."

"How do you know you're disturbed?" Sakura asked.

Naruto looked at her like she was crazy. "How do you think? My heartbeat speeds up, and my hands get clammy, and I start to feel sweaty and shaky all over, and then I feel hot, and then it starts getting dizzy –" He placed his hands on his head in demonstration. "It's like I have the flu! It's obviously me going into spasms of revulsion!"

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "And this doesn't happen when you look at me?"

"Nothing." Naruto shook his head, his eyes wide and earnest. "That's how I know I like you. When I look at your face, I feel great! Just like normal. No heart spasms or anything. Like I could run a race to the top of Hokage Mountain and back." He laughed.

Sakura knew their supposed romance was dead before now, but still. It was another thing to hear it from Naruto's lips like a kiss of death. _Well, great. Just another man who's not attracted to me. It figures. _She turned away. "You're more like Sai than you think."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Naruto demanded.

"It means you're clueless," Sakura said.

"I am not!"

Sakura waited.

Naruto calmed down, but he was fidgeting in agitation. "About what?"

"Your feelings," Sakura said.

"I have a great grasp of my feelings. Ask anyone." Naruto thought. "Except Sai. Cause how would he know? He's dead from the neck up when it comes to that stuff."

Sakura sighed and glanced at him. "You really don't know, do you?"

"Know what?" Naruto glared at her. "Stop acting superior and help me. Sakura-chan, if you know something I don't, tell me."

"I don't know," Sakura murmured. "You might get angry with me."

"No I won't!" Naruto bounced on the balls of his feet and clenched his fists. "Sakura-chan, tell me. Tell me. Please?"

"You feel horrified, terrified, and disturbed, because you like the faces you see when you look at Iruka-sensei, Sasuke-kun, and Kaka-sensei," Sakura said. She faced him. "Likewise, you don't like my face, so you don't react."

"Your face is fine," Naruto protested.

Sakura gave him a small smile. "Thanks, but your libido doesn't say that. Your heart does."

"Libido?"

"Your sex drive," Sakura said wryly. "Do I have to spell it out for you?"

"No, I can spell 'sex drive'," Naruto retorted. He stuck his tongue out at her. "S-E-X, D-R-I-"

"Enough," Sakura said.

"Ha. So now you say I can spell 'sex drive'," Naruto said.

"That's not my point," Sakura said. "Naruto…you're attracted to them. All three of them. The symptoms you listed are signs of sexual attraction. When did you start feeling like Iruka-sensei's face was disturbing? When we were twelve, right? That's because you hit puberty. You hit puberty, and you started noticing that some faces are attractive, while others aren't."

"Nuh-uh," Naruto said.

"No?"

"No, you're wrong about that." Naruto folded his arms. "I was eleven."

Sakura almost fell over. She took a deep breath and gathered her composure. "Right. Well. Sorry. So you were eleven when you noticed that Iruka-sensei is a good-looking man."

"He was always good-looking," Naruto said. "Anyone can tell that. I just started getting confused about it, that's all. Something disturbing started happening whenever I looked at him. That's why I only meet him for ramen now instead of trying to hang out with him every day like I used to. It got too much for me." He pressed his palms together. "Please don't tell him I said that."

Sakura noted the repetition of that plea from earlier at the ramen stand. "Don't worry, I won't."

Naruto relaxed, but only halfway. "So what are you saying, Sakura-chan? That I'm pervy? I've suspected as much as soon as I started training with Jiraiya. I think I just didn't notice before because I liked to think better of myself."

Sakura was bemused. "Pervy?" she murmured. "Maybe." She shook her head. "But Naruto, that's not the point. The point is that you are attracted to them."

"Attraction sure feels like de-traction," Naruto said. He shuddered. Sakura wondered if he was thinking about Kaka-sensei's face again.

"Why does Kaka-sensei's face disturb you so much?" Sakura asked.

"It sparkles!" Naruto looked at her with wide eyes, gesturing helplessly. "I swear! And his mouth is so perfect. It's like –" He made a strangled sound. "No wonder he covers that thing. There's no way I could concentrate if I had to look at his face all day. I might've died! That thing is too powerful. Too powerful, Sakura-chan." He shivered and wrapped his arms around himself.

Sakura snorted. "Naruto…" Honestly, Naruto was acting more like he'd seen a monster than Kaka-sensei's face. _You are so immature. Some people never change, and you're one of them. _"It's just a face. Our teacher's face."

"I know you say that, but you haven't seen it, Sakura-chan," Naruto said.

Sakura sighed. "Don't remind me. I'm still curious, if you must know."

Naruto turned away, stuffing his hands into his pockets, and sighed. "I can't. I can't look at it again. But I want to. Why would I want to do something that destroys me? I don't understand, Sakura-chan. I wish I'd never seen stupid Kaka-sensei's face."

Sakura felt bad for him, when he put it that way. "I'm sorry. Do you know why he showed it to you in the first place?"

Naruto hung his head. "Yeah. He likes me. He told me so himself. I asked him point blank if he meant it, and he said he didn't, but he's always been a lousy liar. He says he's in love with boys and girls. Boys and girls, Sakura-chan." He sighed, more deeply than the last time. "How can that be possible?"

"I believe it's called being bisexual," Sakura said wryly.

"See? Everyone seems to know this stuff but me." Naruto sounded depressed. "I don't know what to do. He likes me, but he won't force me to be around him or anything. I know he won't, because he already says he doesn't like me, and he's trying to act like everything is normal…" He turned around and gave Sakura a tortured look. "But it isn't."

He grasped his chest, clenching his fingers around the material of his sweater that lay over his heart. "If this is part of growing up, I don't like it. Sakura-chan, make it stop. You can make it stop, can't you? You can put me in a coma or something. Or set my growth back. Or – Oh! What about a time jutsu? You could send me back in time, to before I was twelve and any of this happened."

Sakura slapped him.

Naruto froze, stunned, and then clapped a hand to his cheek.

Sakura told herself she was not going to cry. "How could you be so selfish? You would throw away everything you've gained – everything everyone else has gained, too – just so that you don't have to face Kaka-sensei again? Naruto, grow up. It's normal. It's normal to become infatuated with someone and to be scared of seeing them, and want to see them anyway, and then have to make difficult decisions based on your likes and dislikes and how the other person feels. It's normal!" She clenched her hands. "And everyone has to go through it, not just me!"

Naruto took a step back.

Sakura ran. She knew it was stupid of her, but she needed to find someplace private to cry. She couldn't stand to let anyone see her cry, especially not Naruto.

_If I could have forgotten about Sasuke, I would have! _Why did Naruto always have to say the things that hurt the most, somehow? _Of course we would all like to forget about our first crushes!_


	6. Iruka's Advice

**Iruka's Advice**

* * *

Iruka paused in the act of watering the houseplant on his kitchen windowsill when he heard someone energetically ringing his doorbell. Even though it was twelve steps or less to the front door, the person already switched from ringing to pounding on the door with a fist. _Who in the world could need me so urgently, but be unwilling to enter the house?_ That wasn't ANBU's style, not at all. An ANBU agent would just have appeared in his kitchen, right behind him, and started delivering orders.

When he opened the door, he found Naruto, looking out of breath and flushed and emotional.

"Good afternoon, Naruto," Iruka said, surprised. "It's not often that you come looking for me at home. Is there something I can help you with?"

"I'm having pervy thoughts," Naruto blurted. "What should I do?"

Iruka almost fell over. He clutched at the doorknob for support.

"Iruka-sensei? Are you okay?" Naruto looked at him with wide eyes.

"Fine," Iruka said. "I'm fine. Come in, Naruto. Please. It's rude of me to make you stand on the doorstep." He pulled Naruto inside and closed the door. Then he gave Naruto his best everything-is-okay smile. "How would you like some tea?"

"I'd like some ramen better," Naruto said, slipping off his sandals.

"Then I'll make tea and ramen," Iruka said brightly. He slipped into the kitchen. "Why don't you go sit down at the table, and I'll be with you in a minute?" He pointed without looking.

"Huh?" Naruto scratched his head. "Are you sure you don't want me to help, Iruka-sensei?"

"No, no, I've got it all under control," Iruka said. "Besides, you're a guest. It's a rare privilege, you coming to my house instead of searching me out at the Academy."

He needed to hide in the kitchen to get his bearings.

"Okay…" Naruto walked out of the kitchen, into the dining area.

Iruka breathed a sigh of relief. Then he grabbed his tin of tea and a packet of instant ramen from the cupboard. Both things needed hot water. It would be easy to make them at the same time. And he really needed tea. That was the only way he was going to settle his nerves enough to talk. Iruka was not a sex education teacher.

_Kakashi's always reading those damn books. Why doesn't he tell Naruto about sex? For that matter, I thought Jiraiya-sama would! _Iruka filled a kettle with water and set it on the stovetop, turning the burner on high.

Not that his little students hadn't asked him about sexual things, but he'd always had the privilege of saying, 'Ask your parents,' or 'We're not going to talk about that now'.

Naruto didn't have living parents, and they were going to talk about this now. It was the reason for Naruto's visit. And Iruka couldn't let him down.

By the time he presented Naruto with ramen, Iruka had composed himself.

"Great!" Naruto's morose expression split into a grin, and he wolfed down his bowl of ramen in about five seconds, despite the heat of it. He gave Iruka a thumbs up and a beaming smile. "That was good. Thanks, Iruka-sensei."

"Would you like another bowl?" Iruka asked wryly.

"Well…" Naruto looked away, crystal blue eyes innocent.

Iruka chuckled. "It's no trouble."

After feeding Naruto another bowl of pork ramen, Naruto seemed ready to talk. Iruka sat down and sipped his tea. "Why don't you tell me what you mean by 'pervy thoughts'?" he suggested kindly.

"Well, I sort of think about…kissing this person, and stuff…" Naruto squirmed. "And how his lips are like, really pale, and fragile…" He heaved a sigh and slumped. "I never saw his face before this way, and now I want to kill myself. I just want to go back and pretend it never happened. Why did things have to be this way? Things weren't this way in the beginning, when I didn't care…"

That description fit one person Iruka knew of: the ex-ROOT member on Naruto's team. _Well, I suppose Sai is rather handsome, if one goes for paleness._ It was only natural that Naruto would notice his teammates eventually. And Naruto had said far fewer things about Sakura lately.

However, since Naruto didn't mention the name of the person he had feelings about, Iruka guessed that Naruto wasn't comfortable with telling him the identity of the man yet.

"Are you worried about what it means to feel this way about another man?" Iruka asked.

"Yeah!" Naruto squirmed again. "Well, no, I mean, I don't really care that much, but, it's like…No one else has to go through this. No one else is the same way." He frowned and rubbed his chin. "Well, maybe Bushy-Brows Sensei, but it's not like I'd go to him for any help."

"Why not?" Iruka protested. "Gai-sensei is a good man."

Naruto sighed. "But would you understand his advice if you got it? He uses all these big words, and he's so flowery I just can't understand what he's saying most of the time."

"Ah. Yes, that." Iruka looked away ruefully and rubbed the back of his neck. He'd noticed that Naruto had difficulty understanding small words and small sentences, but now was hardly the time to make that observation.

Then he frowned as Naruto's other statement sank in. "What makes you think Gai-sensei is gay?"

"Because he's hugging Lee all the time," Naruto said. He wrinkled his nose. "And Lee is hugging back."

"Hugs don't mean sexual intent," Iruka said.

Naruto looked dubious, but he dropped it. "Whatever. The point is…" He whined. "You gotta help me, Iruka-sensei. I don't know who else to turn to."

"I'll help," Iruka protested. "I'm helping."

"I need to know how to make the feelings go away," Naruto said.

"What feelings?" Iruka asked.

"The pervy feelings!"

"Could you be more specific?" Iruka asked.

Naruto turned red.

"Ah," Iruka said. "Those feelings."

"How do you know what I was going to say?" Naruto asked. "I didn't tell you anything."

Iruka sipped his tea and gave Naruto a small smile. "Everyone has those feelings, Naruto. You know Sakura-chan had those feelings for Sasuke-kun, for a long time. Those are the same feelings."

"Is that why she's mad at me?" Naruto rubbed the back of his head.

"Probably," Iruka said. "What happened?"

"I told Sakura-chan I wanted her to inject me with something that would make the memories go away, so I didn't have to feel this way, and she hit me," Naruto said.

Iruka winced. Violence between his beloved students didn't sit well with him, and he was aware of Sakura's violent streak. There was no one in Konoha who wasn't at this point. "Yes, I'd say that's why she reacted that way."

"And she came and told me later that what I was feeling was pervy, and I said I wished I could go back in time, and she ran away," Naruto said. "She started crying."

"Sakura-chan probably wishes she could go back in time as well," Iruka explained gently. "To before the team split up."

"Oh." Naruto bowed his head, considering that.

Iruka waited.

"But…But I still don't want to feel this way about Kaka-sensei," Naruto said. He raised his head enough to give Iruka a warily hopeful look. "Isn't there something I can do about it?"

Iruka spat out his tea and dropped his teacup.

Naruto wiped his face with one hand. "Iruka-sensei, gross."

"S-Sorry." Iruka handed Naruto some napkins, and retrieved a handful for himself and the table. Tea had gone everywhere.

"What did you do that for?" Naruto asked, wiping his face and neck with napkins.

"I'm sorry," Iruka said. "I was just so surprised…" This radically changed his view of Team Seven.

Naruto sourly crumpled up the napkins, wadding them up and throwing them away in the trash bin across the room without getting up. Of course, he had perfect aim, being a ninja. Still, Iruka remembered the days when Naruto would have missed that shot and then thrown a tantrum.

Iruka threw his own napkins away, smiling. _I guess people really do change and grow. _He glanced at Naruto, and felt a flood of concern. "When did you start feeling this way about Kakashi-sensei?"

"I liked him right away," Naruto muttered. "Ever since he shared that story of how his friend died, and how important teamwork is, and stuff, I knew he was cool. Super cool. He just didn't seem to like us much. And then when we went to the Wave Country and got in all that trouble and had to save each other…I guess we really bonded as a team. But then when we got back home, it was like none of it ever happened. Sakura-chan was just as stupid, and Sasuke hated me just as much, and Kaka-sensei went back to being late and lazy and never telling us anything."

Iruka felt a stab of pain for Naruto. "I see."

"So I went along, but it was really hard," Naruto said. "It's really hard, acting like nothing changes. I just wanted Kaka-sensei to like me. And then he went off and dumped me to train Sasuke." He pouted.

"So you felt these feelings for Kakashi-sensei, all this time," Iruka murmured.

Naruto looked disheartened. "Yeah. I guess so."

"I never suspected," Iruka said ruefully, rubbing the back of his neck. "All of your talk about Sakura-chan really threw me off."

"I thought I liked Sakura-chan too, Iruka-sensei," Naruto said. "Don't feel bad about it. I really thought I would like to kiss Sakura-chan and stuff. She seemed so normal. And she is pretty…She just doesn't give me chest palpitations and cold sweats like she thinks she's supposed to."

Iruka was startled for a moment. Then he laughed. He couldn't help it. "You make it sound like a disease."

"I thought it was!" Naruto spread his hands. "I felt so ill every time I was around Kaka-sensei I thought I was sick. Or Sasuke. I thought he made me sick because I couldn't stand him. Now to find out it's because he's handsome, I…I don't know what to think."

Iruka, commendably, did not choke on his tea again. _Sasuke, too?_ _Could Sasuke have suspected…? Good god, two people on his team, both infatuated with him and both expressing it in completely different ways. It wasn't easy for him, was it? No wonder he ran away. _Not that it made him feel any better, as Sasuke's teacher from the Academy.

"So you have feelings like that towards Kakashi," Iruka redirected.

Naruto nodded emphatically, ran his hands through his hair, and hung his head. "Sakura-chan says I'm just being selfish to want these feelings to go away."

"Selfish?" Iruka was startled. "Well, I don't think it's selfish, Naruto, I think it's natural. You've never faced these feelings before, and you're scared."

"His face has light coming out of it," Naruto said pathetically. "It's like he's not even human. He's some kind of…" He gestured helplessly. "God. Or angel. Or something."

Iruka choked down laughter. "Well, that's very complimentary. I'm sure he would be pleased to know that."

"But I can't say those things to him!" Naruto exclaimed in a strangled voice.

"Why not?" Iruka asked. "Anyone would like hearing them, I'm sure Kakashi is no exception…" _Even if he doesn't share your feelings, he'd have to understand and take pity on you, wouldn't he?_ He couldn't imagine Kakashi torturing Naruto over it. Kakashi loved Naruto. As much as he loved Naruto, in fact, even though it had taken him a while to see it in the man.

"It's pervy!" Naruto clenched his fists. "It's pervy and it's not nice and I can't do it!"

"Pervy?" Iruka blinked. "Telling someone they have a nice face is pervy?"

"It's very pervy and you know it!" Naruto accused.

Iruka wondered where Naruto got his definitions from. "How do you know it's pervy to tell someone there's light coming from their face?"

"I've been around the world with Jiraiya," Naruto said, his expression hardening. "I know. It's pervy stuff." He crossed his arms over his chest. "All the complimenting and the giggling and the flirting…it's all so you can go to bed with each other. And that's pervy." He stared Iruka down and gave the teacher a slow, decisive nod.

Iruka didn't know what to do. He was completely flustered by Naruto's reasoning. "Well…But that…You know he likes that kind of stuff," he blurted. _Oh, boy. What did I just do to this conversation? I have no idea what Kakashi really likes or not. We're colleagues. Just colleagues. _"I don't think Kakashi would mind if you said something pervy to him…he's just that kind of person." Iruka cringed.

"But I can't." Naruto looked crestfallen. "Dattebayo. Really, Sensei. I can't."

"Why not?" Iruka asked.

Naruto squirmed. "Because I'm pretty sure he likes me, too."

"Pretty sure?" Iruka was mystified. _Wait, what? Kakashi has feelings for – How?_

"Okay, I know," Naruto said grudgingly, misinterpreting him. "He told me himself –" Naruto held up his hands, his eyes going wide. " –but – but he didn't know that he did. It's just that I'm smarter than that, that's all. I know when he's lying. Besides, he did everything but tell me the truth. I asked him if he did and he said he didn't, but he told me everything else about how he felt, and I know how he feels. He likes me, Iruka-sensei. Really likes me."

Naruto hung his head. "And Yamato-taichou says that Kakashi doesn't do stuff for anyone but he does it for me, so I know he really likes me." His voice dropped. "He must like me a lot."

Iruka stared at his former student, struggling to absorb all of this. "So you have feelings for Kakashi, and he has feelings for you, too? And he – he told you his feelings first?" He furrowed his brow. "Do I have that right?"

"Yes," Naruto said miserably.

Iruka gestured. "Have you talked about this recently?"

"No," Naruto said. "Not since he went out with Shikamaru and Ino and Chouji and almost got himself killed and I had to come in with Sakura-chan and Sai and Yamato-taichou and help out because he was too stupid to say that he was going and let us come with him in the first place, instead he made it seem like he didn't need us and we didn't need him and he said a bunch of things and lied –" He took a breath, finally. " – and I told him he couldn't do that anymore because he scared me!"

Naruto looked furious. "He's not allowed to just go off whenever he wants and pretend to be someone else's sensei!"

Iruka was taken aback by the sudden anger and the yelling, but he knew Naruto had always been passionate. About everything. Naruto felt every emotion with every fiber of his being, every part of his body utterly consumed by –

_Oh, dear_. Iruka suddenly understood why this situation had turned into a problem. _When Naruto says he likes Kakashi's face…No wonder he feels so horrible. All his life since I've known him he's done nothing but condemn others for having sexual thoughts and desires, and here he is, probably utterly consumed and unable to accept it. _

"Sexual urges are normal for a sixteen-year-old," Iruka said gently. "And in fact, are normal for anyone of any age. Sexual development actually begins quite early. Children start noticing who they do and don't like before hitting puberty. After…well, it just becomes more and more obvious. I think you've hit a point in your life when you can no longer ignore…that you're human."

Naruto stared at him, agape.

"I know what you must be going through," Iruka said. "I had my first major crush at sixteen. These feelings can be very powerful."

Naruto nodded, his mouth still hanging open. Then he asked, "Was it a man or a woman?"

Iruka flushed. "My first crush?"

Naruto nodded, wide-eyed.

Iruka glanced away. "It was my sensei." Then he shrugged, embarrassed at himself for feeling self-conscious. "Everyone's first crush is either a sensei or a teammate, usually. It's pretty rare to get a crush on someone else, with three perfectly good candidates around."

"So…was your sensei a woman?" Naruto asked.

Iruka flushed further. He wondered if he should even answer that. But what was the point of saying he'd help Naruto, if he wasn't willing to answer Naruto's questions? Naruto wasn't being malicious, after all. "No," he said finally.

"Then you fell in love with your male sensei, too!" Naruto exclaimed.

Iruka felt much better about offering up that questionable piece of history. "Yes."

"What do I do?" Naruto wrung his hands nervously, an un-Naruto-like gesture that made Iruka feel sorry for him. "He won't admit how he feels. He thinks I don't like him. And I embarrassed him. I acted so stupid." He thunked his head against the table, slumping.

"It's up to Kakashi to tell you how he really feels and straighten this whole mess out," Iruka said.

"Then I'm just supposed to wait for something that might never happen?" Naruto lifted his head and looked at Iruka with agony.

Iruka looked at Naruto calmly. "No, call him out on it. He's got no excuse for behaving this way. He's fourteen years your senior. He should be acting mature in this situation." He nodded to himself and sipped his tea.

Naruto looked at Iruka with wide eyes. "Call him out on it?"

"This is just the same as any of the other things he's done that you've called him out on," Iruka said. "What it's about doesn't make a difference. He's behaved poorly, so you should make him straighten up." He glanced away and furrowed his brow. "Honestly, I think you're the only person who can. I certainly can't. I don't know him well enough. Gai doesn't try, Yamato…well, the Taichou is a walking doormat when it comes to Kakashi. I'm sure you've noticed that."

Naruto made a face. "Yeah. And he whines about it, too. If Yamato-taichou doesn't like being a wimp whenever Kaka-sensei is around, why doesn't he just change?"

Iruka smiled wryly. "You'd have to ask the Taichou that."

"I will," Naruto said.

Iruka visibly swallowed a smile. "Right after you call Kakashi out on not being honest about his feelings, alright, Naruto? I have a feeling that should come first."

Naruto nodded. Then he frowned. "But didn't you just give me conflicting advice? 'Kakashi has to tell', 'You should call him out on it'."

"It's not really contradictory." Iruka gestured helplessly. "You have to make the first move, demanding an explanation from him. But…that alone isn't going to make him open up to you. People have demanded explanations before, and he hasn't given it to them. Kakashi has to make the decision to talk to you honestly. Even if you hound him…it's still his choice."

Iruka scowled and muttered, "And he better make the right one, or else I'm coming around myself to pound his face in."

"What was that?" Naruto asked, wide-eyed.

Iruka smiled at him. "Nothing."

Naruto watched him warily. "I don't think you should fight him, Iruka-sensei. He's a jonin. He could take you."

Iruka turned beet red. "Well, I'll get a few hits in out of sheer surprise…but then…" He frowned stubbornly. "He wouldn't attack me in earnest, any more than I would him. But if he messes with you, the least he can expect is a few love taps from Konoha's resident Paperwork Ninja. I'm not going to let this go. He better treat you right, or else."

A grin spread across Naruto's face. "Yeah." He laughed. "Kaka-sensei might be a rank above you, but you're my older brother."

Iruka melted. "Darn straight I am!" He hugged Naruto fiercely. "And you can come over whenever you want, to talk to me or crash here for the night, or anything you want."

Naruto was stunned for a moment. Then he hugged Iruka back just as fiercely, blinking away tears. "I will! And I'll come around all the time, and you'll never get rid of me. I'm your brother."

"Yes." Iruka couldn't keep the emotion running through him from choking up his voice. He ran his hand through Naruto's wild, fluffy hair. "You're my brother. And I will always be here."


	7. Seme and Seme

Seme and Seme

Kakashi did not have much warning that Naruto was going to visit before he felt the spike of familiar chakra.

"Kaka-sensei!" Naruto crashed through the door.

Kakashi scrambled to hide under his covers. "I stayed in bed, I promise!"

"This isn't about that!" Naruto yelled from his kitchen, fast approaching.

"What did I do now?" Kakashi whined.

"Iruka-sensei says you need to own up to your feelings and you have no right to treat me this way!" Naruto flung open the door to the bedroom, headed straight for him.

Kakashi scrambled upright in shock, but didn't move fast enough.

Naruto leapt on top of him, straddling Kakashi's hips. He sat there, staring at Kakashi intensely.

Kakashi dropped back a little, propping himself up on his elbows. "Naruto?" The intensity of Naruto's gaze and the crackling of his student's chakra was enough to make him tense inside with fear.

"Start talking," Naruto said. "And make it good."

_A sixteen year old is sitting on my legs. _Kakashi looked at Naruto with wide eyes.

"Well?" Naruto crossed his arms.

Kakashi couldn't comprehend the situation, couldn't think, couldn't come up with a way not to get hurt.

"Talk!" Naruto shouted. "I know all about your feelings. Just say it."

Kakashi trembled, paling. "I'm sorry." The words came out in a whisper.

"Take off your mask," Naruto said.

_The last time he wanted me to put it back on and never show him again._ Kakashi reached up with numb fingers and pulled down his mask, silent and wide-eyed.

Naruto's gaze roved over his face so intently that Kakashi's stomach clenched with self-consciousness.

Kakashi didn't know what to expect. Was Naruto going to hit him? He'd done something to make Naruto angry, and Naruto had always been impulsive. Proof of that was in the fact that Naruto sat right on top of him, partially pinning him to the bed. He knew that with one wrong move, he'd find himself completely immobilized. And Naruto was stronger than him now…even if it was only a slight edge, it was still an edge. In an all-out battle, he'd lose.

Naruto reached out slowly with one hand and touched his cheek.

Kakashi flinched, shuddering slightly in spite of himself. No one touched his face but him. He started to turn his head away instinctively and stopped himself, catching sight of the expression in Naruto's eyes. Naruto didn't look angry anymore. His student just looked…solemn. Resolve, and something else less readable, was in Naruto's eyes.

Naruto's fingers trailed down his cheek, following the curve of his jaw, and finally grasped his narrow chin.

Kakashi blinked, and swallowed. "Maa…" He couldn't think of anything to say.

"There's light coming out of your face," Naruto said softly.

Kakashi didn't think he could have heard right. "What?"

"There's light coming out of your face," Naruto said again. His brow furrowed slightly. "I want to taste it." He leaned forward, tilting his head, and then stopped. "From your lips." He stared at Kakashi expectantly.

Kakashi's mouth dried up. _Light? Lips? Taste it?_ "A-Are you alright?" He strove to sound as if everything was normal, when it was very, very not normal.

"Your lips." Impatience flickered across Naruto's face. "Are you going to kiss me or not?"

Kakashi smiled awkwardly, sublimating a flinch. His heart raced with a combination of embarrassment and amusement at being chastised. "I don't know," he managed to say in a relatively calm voice. "What am I kissing you for?"

Naruto's pupils dilated, and he traced Kakashi's lower lip with his fingertips. "Because I want you to."

Kakashi realized what the look was on Naruto's face. Arousal. Deep, gnawing arousal, mingled with determination. _Oh, god. What? No_. But he couldn't be mistaken, not with the way Naruto's eyes were dilated and the way Naruto touched his lips. "What for?" he asked amiably, trying to buy some time. _What should I do? This is surely wrong. I can't reach Yamato in time – he'd keep it a secret, even if he laughed at me. Oh, god, what am I going to do?_

Naruto leaned in further. "Because I want to taste you."

Kakashi leaned back, sinking down a little more.

Naruto scowled, frustrated. "Baka sensei. I like you. Can't you just handle it? You've been driving me crazy for four years."

Kakashi flopped flat on his back in shock, and as if sensing his weak moment, Naruto dived in and pressed their mouths together, his lips mashing against Kakashi's in raw neediness.

Kakashi couldn't help but let out a startled, muffled cry and tighten his hand on the back of Naruto's neck, none too subtly telling Naruto to exercise some restraint. He shifted into the kiss, directing and teaching, so that Naruto didn't do that horrible, clumsy, smushing thing. In short order, he had Naruto mouthing his lips properly.

He felt Naruto getting hard, that hardness pressed against his stomach. That told him much more than words would ever have been able to. _He means it. He's really attracted to me. How did this happen? Was he like this a few weeks ago?_

Kakashi turned his head away, breaking the kiss in order to breathe. He hadn't been kissed in years, and Naruto was a voracious kisser, so much so that Kakashi had no doubt Naruto would learn to use his tongue within the next ten minutes.

That was one thing that had disconcerted Kakashi; Naruto had come back from Jiraiya's training a quick learner. Whatever had held Naruto back before, he'd overcome it during the course of his three years of training.

_And he's so strong._ Kakashi's heart beat unsteadily.

"Kaka-sensei?" Naruto looked at him uncertainly, as if waking up to what they'd done.

Kakashi met Naruto's gaze. He had no words to offer. He wasn't sure of himself, of how he felt. The most likely reason was that he was still in shock. At least he wasn't terrified, but his mind was blank.

Naruto stroked Kakashi's face aimlessly. His hand was warm and callused.

Kakashi let him. If it helped Naruto stay calm, then it was worth it. And the sensation wasn't exactly unwelcome; just disconcerting. He closed his eyes as Naruto's fingers brushed the underside of his jaw and his neck. Naruto touched a sensitive spot, making him sigh and shiver. He became aware that he was aroused. At that realization, his hips shifted slightly, inadvertently rubbing his clothed hard-on against Naruto's.

His eyes snapped open at Naruto's loud moan. Naruto's head was tipped back to one side, his mouth open, and his left hand went to Kakashi's chest to steady himself. He was shivering.

Kakashi looked at Naruto with wide eyes. He had never seen anything so erotic; not outside the pages of a manga. This wasn't black ink on cheap paper. It was a real human being. A beautiful human being who happened to be a sixteen-year-old boy; a genin with the strength of a jonin; Minato-sensei's son; and his student.

Naruto fisted a handful of Kakashi's black spandex suit and dived in, kissing Kakashi's lips again with barely bridled passion. Kakashi's lips tingled from the force of it, his body buzzing with the way Naruto's chakra crashed down all around him, drowning him, drowning his senses.

Naruto's hand brushed his neck and he gasped, rendered shivering and limp. Naruto shifted his balance and dropped down on top of Kakashi, pressing their bodies together. They were separated by Kakashi's blanket.

Kakashi broke free of the kiss for a moment, panting.

Naruto squirmed, fighting with the blanket. Finally, he kicked it off of Kakashi's body.

Kakashi had a split second's panic, the knowledge of how he wore only his black spandex suit and a pair of boxers underneath. He knew how frail and lithe his body appeared when all he wore was a spandex suit. It hugged his body far too closely, revealed too much.

Naruto lay down over his body, pressing them together again.

The heat pouring off of his student's body felt so good that Kakashi ceased to worry. He closed his eyes and let his head fall back. "Naruto…feels good." He was mildly surprised at the words that emerged.

Naruto let out a low moan in the back of his throat that sounded almost like frustration. He kissed the corner of Kakashi's mouth, then sucked on Kakashi's lower lip.

Kakashi clenched his teeth around a moan. Naruto appeared to be fighting some kind of internal battle. "We need to…talk," he managed to gasp out.

Naruto straightened, straddling his hips again. "You go first – and tell me the truth!" He pointed a finger in Kakashi's face, almost poking Kakashi in the eye.

Kakashi looked at him incredulously. "The truth?" His erection pulsed, a reaction to the loss of warmth and pressure. _The truth should be self-evident!_

"Yeah!" Naruto looked outraged.

Kakashi looked away, scrambled. _The truth? Where do I start? What does he want to know?_

Naruto cupped his face in both hands, a gesture of tenderness that unknotted some of the muscles in Kakashi's shoulders and neck. "Why do you hide your face? How come you're so pretty? Why didn't you just tell me!"

Kakashi stared at him blankly. "Maa…It's a habit. I don't know. And if I'd told you, you would have beaten me up."

"Is that what you think?" Naruto exclaimed.

"It is what I think," Kakashi said. "Or else I wouldn't say so."

Naruto's shoulders slumped, and he bowed his head. "Maybe you're right. I was pretty dumb, and it was mean to judge you like that. I made you uncomfortable, so you didn't want to tell me. I understand. I'm sorry, Kaka-sensei." His hands fell away from Kakashi's face.

Kakashi didn't want to see Naruto like this. He never did. "I-It's okay…" He reached up and touched Naruto's cheek, hoping that he understood the meaning of that gesture to Naruto. It seemed one of affection and intimacy, not something sexual.

Naruto closed his eyes, exhaled, and leaned into the touch, rubbing his cheek against the palm of Kakashi's hand. "Kaka-sensei, I just really wanted you to like me. Only every time I got close, I got afraid you would discover my secret. That's what I think. Some small part of me knew how it was that I really felt, and I was scared of you noticing and figuring it out. Because it's super pervy, and no one likes a pervert…"

Kakashi wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. Laugh, because Naruto's misguided naiveté about what constituted perversion never failed to amuse him, and cry, because Naruto had gone through so much pain because of his misunderstandings. "I don't think you're perverted. Being perverted is something else. To me." He hoped that offering that up could ease some of Naruto's pain.

"Really?" Naruto's eyes opened, and he looked at Kakashi hopefully.

"Really," Kakashi said.

Naruto melted and sank down against him, seeking him out for snuggles instead of kisses this time. "I just wanted you to like me…but you always liked Sasuke better."

Kakashi felt a stab of pain. His eyes suddenly burned. "I was…" How could he form words around this emotion? Around his shortcomings, his past mistakes, his emotional wounds? "So many things were going on. But not one of them was me liking Sasuke better."

Naruto rested his head on Kakashi's shoulder and looked at Kakashi with wide eyes. "It wasn't?"

"No." Kakashi hugged Naruto tightly. After a moment, he reached over and grabbed the covers, pulling up his blanket around them. Then he resumed holding Naruto as tightly as he could. He held Naruto with the strength of guilt. "I was fourteen when you were born. I was old enough to know you needed me and too young to be of any use. I fell into a deep depression. I was useless to anyone in that state. Sandaime spent years trying to rehabilitate me. It was slow going when I was punishing myself. And that was all the time. I punished myself all the time. Gai is the one who got me through that."

"Bushy-Brows sensei?" Naruto looked shocked.

"Yes," Kakashi said. "Believe it or not, the man you insist upon calling 'Bushy-Brows Sensei' is a sensitive friend, and a loyal one. I wouldn't be alive if he hadn't looked out for me."

"So how come you ignored me?" Naruto asked in a tiny voice.

"I wasn't worthy to be close to you," Kakashi said. "Also I feared that if you found out the truth of who I was, you would hate me…" He closed his eyes for a moment, overwhelmed with that old feeling of insecurity. "And I felt useless, knowing that I hadn't stopped anything from happening. I hadn't stopped Minato-sensei from dying, I hadn't stopped anyone in the village from vilifying you, I hadn't done anything to make your path in life easier, I hadn't done anything –" He swallowed, tasting bile. The old panic was dangerously close to coming back and consuming him.

"And Sandaime ordered me to pay special attention to Sasuke," Kakashi said, forcing himself to change subject. "He said that only I stood a chance of teaching Sasuke properly, since I was the only one with a matching talent."

"You mean, your sharingan," Naruto said.

Kakashi nodded. "Yes. Though I failed miserably on that count, too." He closed his eyes for a moment, then looked at the ceiling. "I failed as a sensei for all of you. At the most, I'm a dysfunctional friend."

"You're still my sensei," Naruto said, softly and fiercely. "And you can't be any worse than Jiraiya-sensei. He stole my money and left me alone all the time, and taught me it's okay to be a boozing sex hound as long as you're strong."

Kakashi looked at Naruto with wide eyes, and then came dangerously close to laughing. He supposed that without his mask, Naruto could see that. Now that was a new thought: someone being able to watch every emotion cross his face. He'd been told he had an amazingly expressive face.

Naruto reacted with instant fascination, stroking Kakashi's cheeks with both hands.

Kakashi was surprised, but it didn't shock him like it had the first time Naruto touched his face. _Like a small child…_ He watched Naruto for a moment. _How did I get myself into this?_ He knew that Naruto had never so much as tried to ask someone out other than Sakura. _And I'm expected to make this work?_

But plainly, he was, since Naruto was snuggled up to him, and they had just shared their first kisses, and the specter of past rejection threatened to crush Naruto, much less current rejection. Even if he hadn't loved Naruto, it would have been his duty as a loyal ninja to Godaime Hokage to make sure Naruto didn't shatter, just when everyone needed him most.

"Do you even know anything about homosexual relationships?" Kakashi asked casually.

Naruto shot into a sitting position. "I know lots of stuff, Kaka-sensei! I'm not ignorant!"

Kakashi could have seen this coming. "I wasn't trying to say you were ignorant."

"Yes, you were." Naruto pouted.

Kakashi glanced away. _Well, so much for that defense_. "Maa…do you?"

"What difference does it make?" Naruto demanded. "I'm here, aren't I?"

Kakashi gestured vaguely with both hands. "Let me put it this way: How do you see yourself in this relationship?" If he was going to cobble together a working relationship out of this mess, he needed to know what Naruto's expectations were. So he didn't fail miserably and hurt everyone. He knew that he would, if he didn't know exactly what he was doing.

"How I see myself?" Naruto looked at Kakashi blankly.

Kakashi tried to come up with a rephrase. "What role do you want to play?"

"Role?"

Kakashi held in his frustration. "Yes, role. Relationships are about roles. Like…people act a certain way, and they expect the other person in their relationship to act a certain way. It's best if people clear the air about such things before they start –"

Naruto gasped. "I know what you mean!"

Kakashi paused. "Yes?"

Naruto pointed a finger in his face, making him flinch. "You mean like seme and uke!"

"Ah, I, uh –"

"I'm not going to be uke!" Naruto yelled. "That's gross!"

Kakashi had never expected Naruto to pull those two words out of the bag. 'Seme' and 'uke' was girly yaoi stuff, as far as he was concerned. People didn't actually define themselves that way. Not unless they were joking, or lying. _Great. For all the concepts for Naruto to latch onto…_

Nevertheless, Kakashi had to respond to Naruto's objection. Not mention, he didn't want to get stuck with a sixteen-year-old boy who expected him to become some kind of submissive housewife. Kakashi couldn't think of something more terrifying. Unless he considered Gai finding out about it.

He pointed to himself. "So you expect me to be…"

"No!" Naruto gave him an incredulous look. "Neither of us is going to be the uke. We'll both be seme."

Kakashi held up his hands, weak with relief. If that was how Naruto felt, he could clear up the terminology now without hurting Naruto's feelings. "In that case, I think what you mean is wakushuu and anibun."

"Huh?" Naruto looked at him in confusion.

Kakashi pointed at him. "Wakushuu." Then he pointed at himself. "Anibun."

Naruto scratched his head.

"When there is no 'dominant' and 'submissive', there is 'older' and 'younger'," Kakashi said. "It doesn't imply power relationships, it only states an age difference."

"Anibun?" Naruto furrowed his brow. "I thought that was just another word for an older brother."

Kakashi shook his head. "It's also a word for the older person in a homosexual relationship. Actually, there are lots of words for it, but I happen to like that one. Do you have objections?"

"No…" Naruto trailed off. "But why wakushuu? Is there another word for me?"

"I'm afraid not," Kakashi said apologetically. "Wakushuu is the best we've got. Unless you'd like to invent one, that is."

"What about danshi?" Naruto asked. "I'd like that better…and then it wouldn't have those weird overtones." He shuddered. 'Wakushuu' could also refer to a young actor in a troupe, or a male prostitute. Kakashi suspected that the last connotation was the one Naruto shuddered at.

Kakashi smiled. "Okay. Danshi it is, then. I want you to be comfortable."

Naruto rubbed his chin, frowning. "Are these going to be our titles from now on? Am I going to have to call you 'anibun' all the time?"

"What do you mean?" Kakashi asked, startled.

"Kaka-anibun just doesn't have the same ring to it Kaka-sensei does," Naruto complained.

Kakashi tried very hard not to laugh. "You can call me 'Kaka-sensei' all you want, Naruto. Anibun and danshi will just be for clarification."

Naruto looked relieved. "Good."


End file.
